《谢桥》绿耳

75、月光

　　天空云层渐渐拉开，月亮恢复了她以往的光彩，将那美丽的银色光辉撒下来，光影逐步移向门口，屋内渐渐清晰，我很清楚地看见我的敌人因为害怕而扭曲的面孔，配着她本来的神态，比我更像魔鬼。
　　可是这云散月明却与我的计划完全相背。我暗骂一声，略略侧身，只能将一半的身体隐藏在黑夜里，其余全暴露在明亮的月光下。
　　那女人借着月光看清了我的样子，脸色一变，又羞又怒，破口大骂：
　　“Bitch! Counterfeit! ...Saucy controller of my private steps! You barbarians from East don’t know what a courtesy is, what a privacy is. You rude ignorant…liar even dare to scare me. Now you must take over my anger. I will set the gallows rope in your neck, then you and gallows will be buried until your neck in the cold hard permafrost of the outside city. Let the wild bear graze your head, the wolves dig your body out for all eating beasts. Let you damned foreigner know what kind of person was you ruffled… (天杀的婊子，冒牌的东西！……你好大的胆子，居然敢跟踪偷窥我私人的行动！果然你们这些来自东方的野蛮人不懂得什么是礼节，什么是隐私。你这粗鲁无知……的骗子，竟然敢借机吓唬我，那就必须接下我的愤怒。我要把绞刑架上的绳子套在你的脖子上，然后把你和刑架都埋进城外冰冷坚硬的冻土中，一直埋到你的脖子。让野熊啃食你的脑袋，让豺狼刨出你的尸体，共所有野兽分食。让你们这些该死的异族人知道惹怒了什么样的人……)”
　　我沉默，安静地看着她激动的神情和喋喋不休的嘴唇不断一开一合，看着她丑陋肥胖的身体在微微抖动。我不想去猜原因是受了我的惊吓，还是过于激动而发抖。也许两者皆有，所以她的语调才会稍微有点变音。她的心还没从惊悚中透过气来；我，还没演砸这场戏。
　　我站在门口一动不动，借着我身上过于明显的黑白光影，用厚重低沉的声音，古老的语言缓缓倾口而出：“Unmanner'd dog! Will you flout me thus unto my face, being forbid? Stand you, when I command. Beggar, you are just mortal, and mortal eyes cannot endure the devil. (无礼的狗东西！汝还敢当着吾的面这样放肆吗？吾发号令，汝就得站住。奴才，汝只是凡人，凡人的眼哪能经得起看魔鬼出现？)”
　　那女侏儒猛一退，脸色苍白，神情扭曲。明显不敢相信如此艰涩的语言出自一个东方人口中，再开口时，声音已经很明显地开始颤抖了。
　　“Im-Impossible… No! It shou-shouldn’t be… Wit-ch! You are witch! Don’t think that you wearing oriental mask can deceive me, I…I will not be mislead by you. You had wit would think that I had none, and will o-overreach me in your tricked device. I tell you, no face fits your vicious nature but your own! Do you think that is this a very clever approach? It’s……that……have……You must not think that I am so simple. But I know that the devil itself will not be darted on you. (不…不可能……不！不可能会这样……妖女！你是妖女！不要以为你戴着东方人的面具就可以骗过我，我…我是不会被你欺骗的。你一定以为我是个没有头脑的傻瓜，想用恶毒的计谋愚…愚弄我。我告诉你，任何拙劣的伪装都掩饰不了你恶毒的天性。你以为这是一个很聪明的办法。它…………不是…………没有…………不要以为我是那么蠢，我也知道就是魔鬼也不会完全投射在你身上。)”她越说越快，越说越激动，愤怒地指责着我，仿佛我犯了不可饶恕的罪过。她的语句里添加了好多俚语，说得词句模糊，中间漏了好长一串我都没有听懂。
　　我无视她的激动，镇定着自己。不管她如何地控诉，一直将事情的发展拉紧按照着我的步调走。言语更多的时候是作假的道具。我用上神明的口吻、古老的语气，眼神也越发蔑视着眼前人，傲慢地开口：“Overweening slave! Look at your face, like poorly dog exclaim aloud. Speak like an attendant, proud ambitious slave! Suppose that I am now my Satan's mouth. Close your mouth, and where I stand kneel you. Know’st your deed is chronicled in hell. (妄自菲薄的奴才！汝应该看看汝现在的脸，如同带着恐惧的狗在狂嗥大叫。骄横的奴隶，汝该像一个仆人对吾说话。吾现在代表撒旦发言，叫汝闭上嘴，在吾面前跪下。汝可知汝的行为已经被记载在地狱的黑册之中了。)”
　　我的敌人她的脸上出现惊惶恐惧的神情，很明显我傲慢的语调和她亲眼目睹的异常说服了她的信仰。一个黄肤色的人竟能用来自她的母国如此华丽庄严的语言来叱责她，倘若不是神明显灵那又是什么？但是，教养的骄傲却不允许她对我这个异族人下跪。在被我的话语震撼时，她的膝盖稍微弯了弯，却又立刻挺直，脸上尽是复杂的神绪。我知道如果我再推一把，她就会掉进我的圈套。
　　我脸上涌出迷幻的神色，似代替无上的神明借我的身呈神迹显示，诵着这古老的语言，用上沉重的音韵。如诗歌般华丽的大段句子，一点一点浸淫出神明不可碰触的庄严和人类永生也够不着的通透黑暗。在弥漫着潮湿腐朽气味一半明一半暗的小房间里，一片一片侵蚀着凡人它自以为是的灵魂：“Inspired merit so by breath is barr'd. It is not so with Satan that all things knows as 'tis with people that square your guess by shows. However, most it is presumption in people when the help of Satan we count the act of men. God that of greatest works is finisher, often does them by the weakest minister. Great floods have flown from simple sources, and great seas have dried when miracles have by the greatest been denied. Often expectation fails and most often there. Where most it promises, and often it hits, where hope is coldest and despair most fits. You are recorded in the devil's now, lies in your wretched ridiculous exaggerated behavior and does think it rich. (天启的智能常常就是这样被一言所毁。凡人总是凭着外表妄加臆测，而无所不知的撒旦却不是这样的。明明是来自它的援助，人们却武断地诿之于人力。岂知哪怕是创造这世界的神，也往往借助于最微弱者之手。洪水，可以从涓滴的细流中发生；但当世间的君王不肯承认奇迹的时候，大海却会干涸枯涩。最有把握的期望，往往结果终于失望；最少寄望的事情，反会出人意外地成功。汝明明已经在魔鬼的簿上挂了名了，还用这种可怜又可笑的夸张的举止，试图表演着汝高贵的形象。)”我突然大喝一声，“Most disrespectful of the lost sheep, even dare to stand in front of me? You really are not blind? (无礼的迷途羔羊，竟然还敢在吾面前站立？汝当真是瞎了眼睛不是？)”
　　‘卜通’她的膝盖跪在了地上，双手颤抖着无力地举起。我知道她的思绪已混乱，乖乖地跟着我走。但还不够，我还要给她更重的打击，让她陷入自己为自己打造的恐惧中，在炼狱里烧灼她可怜的灵魂。
　　我拿过柜上的蜡烛，手指轻轻碰了下烛心，‘啪！’的一下，蜡烛被我点燃了。这时跪在我面前的人的脸色已经变成死灰色，下意识地往后缩了几步，开始惧怕起这来自黑暗的力量。
　　没有火种，没有任何工具，就可以只手燃亮烛台；不是英格兰人，却能口吐出华丽艰涩的英语；不是教徒，却知教意，一身不可碰触的庄严；漆黑的发色，漆黑的眼睛，处女的身体，无一不是撒旦的宠爱，最可能出现神迹的条件全具备一身；似鬼似魔的气息，配上低吟慢咏的飘渺之声，犹如地狱里传来的魔歌，引人向黑暗的深处走去……我知道，我所具备的所有一切全扣击在这个女人理智的缺口上。我看到她脸上的神色逐渐被黑暗覆盖，动摇的信仰开始对着魔鬼倾斜，眼里的智慧一点一点被贪婪和疯狂允吸，脸上的神情也慢慢变样。
　　我笑了，她信了，我知道她信了。女人啊，意志最坚强却也最软弱的动物。只要抛对你的威胁和诱惑，就可自然地牵着她走。最娇美的恶魔最能观察一个女人的心。当然啊！还有什么能向魔鬼索取光阴更加让女人着迷的事呢？！
　　我缓缓地向她伸出手，她懂了。爬起来走到我的面前跪下，亲吻我的手背。然后开始呢喃道：“I am a useless person, and all listen to what thou mean. God pardon all oaths that are broke by me, and became to thy servant. I swear by my soul! I throw my hands, my eyes, and my heart to thou. Yours, in all compliments of devoted and heart-burning heat of duty. JANE DOMINIK POLLARD.（我是一个没用的废人，一切听从您的尊意。愿上帝宽宥一切被我毁弃的誓言，从此成为您的仆人。我用我的灵魂宣誓！我向您俯首贴耳，一心皈依。抱着必恭必敬、燃烧全心的忠诚，你的仆人简•德米力克•波拉德敬上。）”
　　我满意得微眯眼睛，蜡烛上的火苗越来越旺，终于，视觉与心理上的双重假像蒙掉了她的眼睛与信念。眼前这个女人，捧着她自己可怜的信仰，被人轻而易举地控制住，此刻甚至能够听从任何人的召唤。人类在这种幻觉和假像面前的心理漏洞更比平时来得单薄和脆弱。她现在就如同一部机器，等待着接收指令。至于那几十年的信仰与认知不管能否在她事后清醒后回来，也抹不掉这一刻的动摇。她的信念，不管怎么补，都已经有了缺口了：“Hung be the heavens with black, yield day to night. you are, JANE DOMINIK POLLARD, a servant of Satan you’ll be from now on. To follow the footsteps of its sin, in this garden of hell your soul let it! You might have remember’d the unfortunate you, devise extremes beyond extremity and revenge back. Let people adversity, let them cry, let the dire thought of their committed evil, let them scream repeatedly, disturb their silent sleep with restless nightmares even if they died. This is what I give you the most evil of the toxin, and most sweet gift. However, you will never escape the fate of retaliation if you violated your oath. If so, the world will hold you in disdain, Sith in your folly so fair a hope is slain. 'I will let the ceaseless lackey to eternity, with some mischance cross you in your flight; let the cursed night entangled endlessly around you, shape every bush a hideous shapeless devil; Afflict you in your bed with bedrid groans; let there bechance you pitiful mischances; to make you moan; repent and curse your own short-sightedness and ignorance in despair. If you choose to end your ugly life away, don’t forget the death of their own is my area. Your life must be tomb'd with you, and I will let you pay a hundred times the price for your unrecalling. To know that, hell is so close, and heaven is out of reach.（让天空张起黑幕，叫白天让位给黑夜。汝——简•德米力克•波拉德——从此成为撒旦的侍仆。追随起吾者罪恶的足迹，在这地狱的花园放纵汝的灵魂吧！牢牢记住汝之不幸，策划出种种比极端还要极端的手段报复回去。让那些人不幸，让那些人哭号，让他们惊恐得魂飞目眩，让他们尖叫连连，让他们即使长眠也有永无宁息的梦魇滋扰他们宁息的永远。这是吾赋予汝之最邪恶的毒素，也是最甜美的馈赠。但若汝违背了汝之誓言，汝将永远也摆脱不了吾报复汝之命运。如果真如此，那全世界就都会把汝鄙夷，因为汝的愚蠢，把这样美好的前途窒息。吾会让‘永恒’的侍仆——奔波不息的‘时间’摆布下凶灾，整治汝这逃犯；让被诅咒的夜晚无止境地纠缠在汝身旁，让汝做贼心虚的惊恐，把途中每一丛灌木，都看作鬼魂显现；要让汝呻吟床褥，熬受病痛的磨折；定教汝迭遭祸殃，处处变生不测；迫令汝呜咽悲啼，绝望地悔恨和咒骂自己的短浅和愚昧。而若汝选择结束掉汝丑恶的生命，别忘了死亡本身就是吾之领域。汝尽管带着汝之性命同汝进坟墓，而吾会让汝为汝之无法勾销的罪戾付出百倍的代价。要知道，地狱触手可及，而天堂遥不可及。）”
　　银白色的光辉湮没整个房间的地面。从窗口望出去，月亮压在干枯的老树顶上，树上还有乌鸦两三只，安静得很血腥。
　　月光和莎士比亚啊，在传说中似乎就有令人发狂的能量！