《闲来背书度日长》毕优

3、闲来背书度日长之二《呼啸山庄》

　　对于这本书，我不知写什么才好。
　　我深爱书中的爱情、痛苦、迷恋、残酷、执著、报复、伤害、绝望、疯狂及死亡。阴霾的天空，狂躁的暴风雨，带着死亡气息的雪夜，荒凉的风景……
　　但我只想背背书中最有名的独白。
　　I cannot express it; but surely you and everybody have a notice that there is or should be, an existence of yours beyond you. What were the use of my creation, if I were entirely contained here? My great miseries in this world have been Heathcliff’s miseries and I watched and felt each from the beginning; my great thought in living is himself. If all else perished, and he remained, I should still continue to be; and if all else remained, and he were annihilated, the Universe would turn to a mighty stranger. I should not seem a part of it. My love for Linton is like the foliage in zhe wood. Time will change it, I’m well aware, as winter changes the trees——my love for Heathcliff resembles the eternal rocks beneath——a source of little visible delight, but necessary. Nelly, I am Heathcliff! He’s always, alwaye in my mind——not a pleasure to myself——but as my own being.
　　——Catherine Earnshaw
　　我不能说清楚，可是你和别人当然都了解，除了你之外，还有，或者是应该有，另一个你的存在。如果我是完完全全都在这，那么创造我又有什么用处呢？在这个世界上，我最大的悲痛就是希刺克厉夫的悲痛，而且我从一开始就注意并且感受到了。在我的生活中，他是我最强的思念。如果一切都灭亡了，而他还留下来，我就能继续活下去；如果别的一切都留下来，而他却给消灭了，这个世界对于我将成为一个既陌生的地方。我不会是它的一部分。我对林惇的爱像是树林里的叶子：我完全晓得，在冬天变化树木的时候，时光便会变化叶子。我对希刺克厉夫的爱恰似下面的恒久不变的岩石：虽然看起来它给你得愉快并不多，可是这点愉快却是必需的。耐莉，我就是希刺克厉夫！他永远永远在我心里。他并不是作为一种乐趣，并不见得比我对自己还有趣些，却是作为我自己本身而存在。
　　——卡瑟琳. 恩萧