19、特洛伊 在乎 ...
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“Why did it take you so long? Everyone has been waiting.”(你怎么去了这么久，人家都等着呢)
沈若斐对着急急跑回来的Toby微微不满道。看到他额头上密密的小汗珠，又噤住了声。
“My friend, he chatted with me for a while.”(我朋友，他和我聊了会儿天。)
“Sorry, Serena. I'm just back in a hurry. Please forgive me, okay?”(对不起Serena，我这不是紧赶慢赶回来了嘛，原谅我好不好。)
Toby又用上了他的惯用手段——撒娇。
沈若斐没多想，宠溺地应道。
“OK, I forgive you. Let's finish shooting this last set and then we'll go home.”(好好，原谅你了，快最后一套拍好照我们回家了。)
“Here I come!”(保证完成任务！)
接下来的拍摄很顺利，沈若斐依旧是那个专注利落的负责人，指挥着演员走位，核对拍摄细节。
她站在补光灯侧后方，目光稳稳落在取景框里，一眼就看清 Toby 的走位——他步子轻而稳，知道哪里光最匀、哪里不穿帮，走到标记点时微微侧身，既不挡主镜，又能把侧脸线条留得好看。
她指尖轻点平板，没出声提醒，只在他经过暗区那一步轻轻抬了抬下巴。Toby 立刻心领神会，脚步微收半步，刚好落进暖光里。整套动作流畅自然，不用反复喊卡，也不用多余解释，一看就是熟手。
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今天白天沈若斐一直在图书馆学习，从书海中抬起头时已经晚上八点多了。许是自己最近学得太猛，感觉直起身子都一阵眩晕。她支撑不住，趴在桌上眯了会儿。
没睡着，睡不着，焦虑。就这么闭着眼，突然猛然间她抬起头，发丝随着脑袋凌乱飘散。
绞尽脑汁想了两天Toby爸爸的生日礼物送什么，刚刚刹那间她想到，为什么不送自己最拿手的东西呢？
刚好社团还有多余的大衣，不如就今天叫Toby来试下。他也知道他爸适合什么风格的衣服。
于是晚上八点三刻，Toby来了USC的服装社团内。他到的时候还有大二的团员在拍摄，望了望人群，一眼看到了有着独特面孔的Serena，向她奔过去。
“What's wrong Serena?”
“Your dad isn't having his birthday soon, right? I was thinking there are still some jeans and coats left here. I was thinking of giving them to your dad as a gift. Would you like to help me try them on?”(你爸不是要生日了吗？我想着这儿还有几天牛仔和大衣，我想送给你爸当礼物，你来帮我试试看？)
“OK. Fortunately, my dad hasn't gotten fat yet. My build is similar to his. Let me take a look for you.”(行啊，还好我爸还没发福，我跟他身材差不多，我来帮你看看。)
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拍摄工作结束时已经是九点半了，沈若斐和Toby走在夜晚的USC校园里，不算冷清，仍有人刚从图书馆内出来。
“Who called you? So long.”(谁给你打电话？这么久。)
“Ethan, he called me via video call. I was afraid it would be inconvenient in the shed, so I went out to answer it.”(Ethan给我打视频电话，我怕在棚里不方便，就出去接了。)
“Ethan？”
这三个字像一颗小石子，猝不及防地砸进沈若斐的心湖。她拎着手提袋的手指猛地一紧，整个人瞬间怔住，耳边的噪音仿佛都被隔绝在外，脑海里只剩下这个许久未被提起的名字。陆则川，那个总是带着点少年气的倔强，会对着她乱发脾气，却也会在她需要时默默出现的男生。
沈若斐和Toby并肩走着，影子被路灯拉得很长，交织在一起。
她犹豫了许久，终于还是开口，声音很轻，带着一丝试探：“Toby, Ethan is in New York. Was he just chatting with you out of boredom? Did he say anything else? For instance... Did he encounter any problems?”(Toby，陆则川在纽约，真的只是因为无聊才找你聊天吗？他有没有说别的？比如……有没有遇到什么事？)
Toby放缓脚步，语气依旧温和：“It's really nothing. I just spend every day at the hospital by my grandma's side. There are all adults around, and there's no one of the same age to talk to. It's just a bit lonely. His parents are busy contacting doctors and arranging for a transfer to another hospital. They have no time to accompany him or chat with his grandma. So he has to bear it all by himself.”(真没事，就是天天在医院陪奶奶，身边都是大人，没个能说话的同龄人，有点孤单而已。他爸妈忙着联系医生、安排转院，根本没时间陪他，也没时间陪奶奶聊天，他就只能自己扛着。)
沈若斐沉默了，脚下的步伐也慢了下来。她在假装想象，陆则川在纽约的样子——一个人坐在椅子上，看着父母忙碌的身影，想帮忙却插不上手，心里委屈又无助，只能对着远方的朋友倾诉。
“Well......”(其实……)沈若斐的声音更低了，带着一丝愧疚，“Before he went to New York, I had a quarrel with him.”(他去纽约之前，我和他吵了一架。)
Toby并不意外，反而反问：“Is it because of your car?”(是不是因为你的车？)
沈若斐猛然侧过头，眼里满是惊讶：“How do you know?”(你怎么知道？)
“That day he came to my house to get some study materials from me, but he found your car wasn't there.”Toby笑了笑，回忆起当时的情景，“I told him that you had a car accident and the car was sent for repair. As soon as he heard that, without even taking his study materials, he hurriedly left. He was going to look for you.”(那天他来家里找我拿学习材料，发现你的车不在。我跟他说你出了点车祸，车送去修了，他一听，连学习材料都没拿，就急急忙忙跑出去了。他是去找你了。)
沈若斐叹了口气，眼底的愧疚更浓了：“He arrived at my apartment and had a fierce argument with me. He asked me why I didn't tell him about such an important matter and said that I didn't consider him as a friend.”(他到了我公寓，就跟我大吵了一架。问我为什么这么大的事不告诉他，说我不把他当朋友。)
她顿了顿，语气里带着一丝无奈：“At that time, I was also very upset. I didn't tell you or him. I just felt that both of you were still preparing for college entrance exams, which was a crucial time. I didn't want to distract you. Besides, the car accident wasn't a big deal. I could handle it myself. And I had heard enough of those comforting words. I don't want to listen to them anymore.”(我当时也很委屈，我没跟你说，也没跟他说，就是觉得，你们两个都还在准备考大学，正是关键的时候，我不想让你们分心。而且，车祸也不是什么大事，我自己能处理好，那些安慰的话，我听得够多了，也不想再听了。)
“I think you are still kids. Even if I tell you something, it won't solve any practical problems. Instead, it will just make you worry.”(我觉得你们还是小孩，跟你们说了也解决不了什么实事，反而会让你们担心。)
Toby看着她，沉默了片刻，才缓缓开口，语气很冷静，也很真诚：“Serena, I've known Ethan for three years. He has never been someone who only says comforting words. He is very considerate towards his friends. Whether it's me or any of the other classmates, if anyone is in trouble, he will step forward to help immediately.”(Serena，我认识Ethan三年了，他从来都不是一个只会说安慰话的人。他很为朋友着想，不管是我，还是其他同学，只要谁遇到了困难，他都会第一时间站出来帮忙。)
“Moreover, you are one of the few Chinese people he met in Los Angeles. In a foreign land, encountering someone of the same origin naturally makes you feel closer. He cares about you not because you need his help, but because in his heart, you are an important friend. When you encounter something, he wants to know about it and wants to be with you. Even just standing by your side, for him, is a kind of reassurance.”(而且，你是他在洛杉矶遇到的为数不多的中国人。在异国他乡，遇到一个同根同源的人，本身就会格外亲近。他在乎你，不是因为你需要他的帮助，而是因为，在他心里，你是很重要的朋友。你遇到了事，他想知道，想陪着你，哪怕只是站在你身边，对他来说，也是一种安心。)
他顿了顿，看着沈若斐的眼睛，一字一句地问道：“Serena, don't you consider Ethan as a very important person of the same kind?”(Serena，难道你没有把Ethan也当成很重要的同类人吗？)
这句话，像一把温柔的锤子，重重地敲击在沈若斐的心上。
那些潜藏在心底的情绪，那些被她刻意忽略的在乎，在这一刻，全都被这句话唤醒。就像被冰雪覆盖的种子，突然被阳光照拂，瞬间破土而出，长成了参天大树。她一直以为，自己只是把陆则川当成一个需要照顾的弟弟，可直到此刻，她才明白，他早已不是那个只会乱发脾气的少年，而是她在异国他乡，最珍贵的同类，是她心底，最柔软的牵挂。
她怔怔地站在原地，路灯的光晕落在她的脸上，映出她眼底的动容。原来，她不是不在乎，只是不敢承认；原来，她和他一样，都把彼此，放在了心里很重要的位置。
Toby看着她的模样，知道她听进去了，便继续说道：“Ethan promised me that he would definitely come back three days later, on my father's birthday.”他的语气带着一丝期许，“You can take this opportunity to have a heart-to-heart talk with him and clear up the misunderstanding. Some things, if kept in your heart, will only lead to regret.”(Ethan答应我，三天后我爸爸的生日，他一定会赶回来。你可以借这次机会，跟他好好聊聊，把误会解开。有些话，藏在心里，只会变成遗憾。)
沈若斐缓缓点了点头，心里的迷雾，仿佛有些散了。
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而Toby刚才在电话里和陆则川说了谎，是因为他刚到衣帽间时，无意间扫到了衣架另一侧的一件衣服——那是一件深灰色的男士长款棉大衣，长度几乎拖到地面，面料是厚实的防风材质，领口和袖口都镶着柔软的狐狸毛，版型宽松大气，一看就知道是为高个子设计的。
他的脚步顿住了。
这件大衣，他下午来服装社找沈若斐时就看到了。当时他刚挂了陆则川的电话，心里还记挂着陆则川在纽约的寒冷，想着他总是穿得单薄，便随口问了沈若斐：“Is this coat a surplus sample? Could you give it to me?”(这件大衣是多余的样品吗？能不能送给我？)
沈若斐当时正在整理设计稿，头也没抬地说：“Well, it's the remaining part from that collaboration. The size is too special and no one wants it. If you want it, you can take it. ”(嗯，是之前品牌合作剩下的，尺寸太特殊，没人要，你要就拿去。)
他知道，这件大衣的版型，是拖地款的棉风衣，188的陆则川穿上，刚好能露出一小截小腿，既保暖，又不会显得拖沓。纽约的二月比洛杉矶冷得多，这件大衣，正好能给陆则川带去一丝暖意。
“What's wrong?”沈若斐见他站着不动，疑惑地问道。
“Nothing.”Toby回过神，把手里的购物袋放在一旁，穿上了牛仔外套，“I just think this coat looks quite nice.”(就是觉得这件大衣挺好看的。)
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两人一路走着，不知不觉，就到了停车场。
Toby看着不远处那辆熟悉的米白色甲壳虫，惊讶地瞪大了眼睛：“Has your car been repaired? So quickly?”(你的车修好了？这么快？)
“Well, I went to pick it up this afternoon.”(嗯，今天下午去取的。)沈若斐笑着说，拿出车钥匙，按了解锁键，“Just in time! I'll take you home.”(刚好派上用场，送你回家。)
她打开车门，坐进驾驶座，Toby也跟着坐上了副驾驶。发动机发出轻微的轰鸣声，温暖的风从空调里吹出来，驱散了夜晚的微凉。
车子缓缓驶出USC校园，朝着Toby家的方向驶去。路灯的光影在车窗上飞速倒退，映在两人的脸上，安静而温馨。
或许，三天后的生日会，会是一个新的开始。
