我也不知道什么时候把这文放出来,或许是在真正找到安绪的时候吧。wish it would be not longerXD
Sometimes, I think that I am just like the woman that from a Novel named ‘A Letter from an Unknown Woman’.
I am like her.
She wrote the letters to someone who she has deeply loved. However, the one doesn’t know her existence at all. Her love is so pessimistic and brokenhearted, but so moving and touching.
How pure and innocent the love is.
But luckily, she have someone who is existed in reality anyway, even though sometimes he made her heart broken.
I...
But I...
There is even no a real one in this world for me.
There is no Anxu, you are not in real, you are in vain, just like a piece of white paper, a pale of fresh air...
I can’t see, can’t touch, can’t smell, can’t hear...only feeling you by my own imagination.
What a so funny story, so lovely and touching story, and I made it just because I want to make it come true...
But the truth is always cruel, there is no miracle and no surprise in our real life, which is only in the fairy tales.
I do want to write letters to Anxu, just like the unknown woman write to her lover.
But...who should I send to ?
Where are you, Anxu ?
Are you in Vienna, just like the author?
I should write it and send the letter to Vienna?
I must be crazy, and I shall be crazy...
However, I will not.
Maybe, from the optimistic point of view, I have more chance and opportunity than the Unknown woman, that is you are Unknown, and I am lucky.
Unknown is indeed mysterious.
Unknown is quite fortunate.
Sometimes, known is desperation.
But, Unknown is hope.
Yes, I am quite confidence with you, and the true love. It’s never disappeared form my deep heart.
And I never get rid of it from my mind, I will certainly insist on it and keep it until your appearance, which make me quite sure of it.
True love is worthy of awaiting and expecting indeed.
The other reason is you.
That because of you, so I made my mind up to awaiting patiently. It’s just you that are deserved of my voluntary and willing waiting.
Anxu, I wonder if someday you will see my writing and my diary, what do you think of these?
Do you laugh at myself or be moved by my feelings on you ?
I don’t know. I have no any idea about that.
I just hope you will be fine, everything will be fine just not very perfect.
Because I am selfish, I do hope your life will not be so perfect without me.
Yes, me , our children, and then, your life would be definitely and completely perfect.
That’s my life too.
And I am sure of it and sincerely hoping for that.
Do you agree with me?
Yes, I know that is your answer.
Asking by myself and answering by myself is quite fatigue, so, when you turn up, just be your turn, I’d better to have a rest.
Or you will feel me talking too much, more gossiping, then you will be tired and bored of me...
Ouch...
Stopping it now.
Anyway, thanks a million.
I feel much better now. Anxu. Sleep well.
My boy and my sweetie girl, sleep well too.
Mommy loves all of you.
Good night. Sweet dream.